How to let go of an Unhealthy Relationship

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Endings happen

Business relationships

Love relationships

Client relationships

Sometimes things just fall apart.

Have you ever felt happy with someone or bumbled along in a business partnership and a curveball appears and things fall apart?

Here’s the thing that’s happened to me many times.

Before I  Got The Confidence Factor I often settled for less than I deserved.

Sometimes for ages after things fell apart I felt grief and sadness and missed the unhealthy relationship or struggled to accept the business partnership was over.  Even when in my heart and soul I knew it wasn’t in my best interest to be in that relationship or business

I wanted to move  forward.

I wanted a business partnership that supported the essence of who I was and helped me thrive  and championed me and was equal. I wanted a relationship that was respectful, loving and healthy.

I meditated.

My answer came.

I was in love with the ideal of being in love, not in love with that person or happy with that business partnership. Both were unhealthy relationships.

My grief, sadness and pain was brought about because I kept going into eurphoric recall.

Wikipedia – Euphoric recall is a psychological term for the tendency of people to remember past experiences in a positive light, while overlooking negative experiences associated with that event(s).

I was in denial about the toxic happenings, the control issues, the bad. I was spending so much time addicted to potential and not seeing  these people for who they truly were.

Underlying this pining was hurt and below that hurt was fear – fear of being hurt again. I  contracted within as I was fearful of being hurt again, so I then became stuck.

However I refused to allow fear to take over my life. I now had The Confidence Factor

I don’t want to live in the past, but I did  need to learn to live comfortably with it.

Even though the past has not lived up to my expectation,  I don’t fear reminders of those times, nor try to block them out.

It takes energy  and strength to try to hold shut the door to the past. Coming to terms with mistakes we have made, forgiving ourselves, and forgiving others releases this energy so we can use it for living more fully now, in the present.

It may mean we have to change our perspective on the way life really works,  and open our minds to new ideas.

Coeur is the French word for “heart.”

By acting with courage we let go of what isn’t good for us and  accept something or someone better is coming. We come from our hearts, not our heads and boldly do what feels right.

We may be scared if we’re going against the grain, but we when we have self confidence and high self esteem we have the  faith to support our actions.

Being courageous does not require going into battle — It takes a lot of courage just to be honest with ourselves and others, to decide to change behaviors, and to let go of destructive relationships.

Trust, all is well in your world and everything is excatly as it is meant to be!

Annie